Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
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