And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
