well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
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