her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Randomize
