spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Randomize
