Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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