he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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