i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
so much tequila, so little girl.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
Randomize
