my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Randomize
