Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
we're so committed to being not committed
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize