so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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