As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Randomize
