belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
and i looked up. we had an audience...
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
