Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
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My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
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You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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