We won't sleep together?
Do you still have your period?
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
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I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
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Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina