i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
