she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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