We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
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