i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
