She said her name was "party"
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
You left your phone here
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