maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
