hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
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