So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
