This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
porn star boner night. come get it.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
