I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize