I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I don't deserve a penis
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
well, you know. whores of a feather.
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