My friends, they love my intelligence
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
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