There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize
