And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I just found a bag of teeth...
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
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