I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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