Are we in a gay sports bar?
The spoon I was using to ice my hickey just fell out of my purse while i was paying at the liquor store. I look like an alcoholic with a meth problem.
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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