i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Randomize
