I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Swine flu. Run for my life!
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
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