You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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