Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Also, beer. Big fan.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
i've created a new STD.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Randomize
