Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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