On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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