I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Randomize
