He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I'm at a crab and wine festival with my dad. He just introduced me as his girlfriend to all of his co-workers. I am so drunk I thought he was serious.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
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