i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
My balls are so social today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
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