Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
