I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
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i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
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You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
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