I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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