There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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