Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize