I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
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