it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
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just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
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LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
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