yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Randomize