I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
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