it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
