Can Purell be used as lube?
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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