It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
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