I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
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